


RA's Report: The Potter/Malfoy Situation

by Porphyrios



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Harry Potter Epilogue What Epilogue | EWE, Hogwarts Eighth Year, M/M, Roommates, Tumblr Prompt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-02
Updated: 2019-11-02
Packaged: 2021-01-16 18:29:14
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 650
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21275738
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Porphyrios/pseuds/Porphyrios
Summary: The poor RA who has to deal with Harry and Draco suddenly ending up as roommates.  All we have is his reports.  He seems to have gone through a lot, poor dear.





	RA's Report: The Potter/Malfoy Situation

**Prompt:** College AU where Ron moves in with Hermione and Draco becomes Harry’s new roommate - from the POV of their RA (Resident Assistant). Maximum 770 words. #drarryland

=

_14 March, 1999_

_Headmistress: _

_Enclosed please find the assembled reports as requested filed by 8th year RA Brambulus Muggins before his illness. Please wish him a speedy recovery from the whole records room. _

_\- Lavinia_

=

7 Sept. 1998 // Notified re: unexpected change. Weasley unexpectedly housed with Granger pending nuptials. Due to lack of available choices in re: lateness of decision, Potter assigned to room with Malfoy. Initial advisement of new arrangement starkly unwelcome to both parties. Physical altercation halted by Filch. 10 points from each house.

9 Sept. // Repair conducted to Malfoy bed; spell damage, unknown spell. Prof. Flitwick able to return coverlet to proper shape, no longer attempting to eat Malfoy. Potter detention 1 wk with Snape. 15 points from Gryffindor.

10 Sept. // Formal reprimand delivered to Malfoy. Potter's wardrobe destroyed by pixies, all garments lost. Replacement ordered, bill remitted to Malfoy estate. 20 points from Slytherin.

11 Sept. // Physical altercation between Potter and Malfoy halted by Filch. 1 week detention each with Filch. McGonagall notified. 10 points from each house.

17 Sept. // Ice sculpture of Malfoy removed from common room. Not enough evidence to punish Potter, but strong suspicion.

25 Sept. // Poster of naked Potter removed from showers. Event clearly linked to sculpture event of 17 Sept. Potter and Malfoy sent to McG for discipline. Poster not sent due to excessive lewdness of depicted actions.

10 Oct. // Stash of inappropriate <del>porn</del> <del>maga</del> literature confiscated from Potter/Malfoy room. Unable to determine owner, both parties acting <del>guil</del> <del>suspicio</del> guilty. Content highly <del>sexu</del> prurient.

1 Nov. // Loud argument between Potter and Malfoy. Advised both to reduce noise levels. Conflict seems to be much reduced. No punishment recommended because <del>they haven't been fighting as much</del>Potter and Malfoy accepted responsibility for disruption and apologized.

3 Dec. // Potter and Malfoy reprimanded for making unauthorized changes to dormitory. Walls transfigured back to standard. 10 points from each house.

6 Dec. // Potter and Malfoy reprimanded for making unauthorized changes to dormitory. Rug transfigured back to standard. Stains removed. 10 points from each house.

10 Dec. // <del>Pott</del> Told them if they didn't stop transfiguring the dorms I would send them to McGonagall tied together and gagged. Apologies to whoever reads this report, but I said it. 20 points from each house.

20 Dec. // Notified at last minute that Potter and Malfoy would be staying over the holidays. Unsupervised. Would like to officially note extreme personal reservations as to advisability of this decision.

10 Jan. 1999 // Potter and Malfoy reprimanded for making unauthorized changes to dormitory. No transfiguration this time, but beds pushed together in center of floor. <del>Not thinki</del> <del>Tryin</del> <del>God</del> Uncertain as to purpose of rearrangement, advised that dorm rooms must remain in accepted configuration. <del>10 poi</del>

21 Jan. // Potter and Malfoy reprimanded for sharing shower stall. Excuses about saving water offered. Questions from other students v. awkward. <del>To whoever reads these reports, what am I supposed to do here?</del> Please advise as to proper protocol for <del>shaggi</del> <del>sexu</del> inappropriate relationships between roommates. Subject unaddressed in RA Advisory Notices.

10 Feb. // <del>Really</del> Loud <del>sha</del> noise coming from Potter/Malfoy room. Numerous complaints by other students, including some several rooms away. Submitted request to reassign rooms or cast muffling charms. Muffling charms against regulations. Please advise.

13 Feb. // Advised Potter and Malfoy if noise continues at current level that they would be remanded to McGonagall for discipline. Inappropriate comments resulted. Both laughed in my face. <del>Attem</del> McGonagall notified. PLEASE ADVISE.

27 Feb. // Can't take any more of this. Bloody savages, shagging like rabbits. Haven't slept. Been a week. Can't sleep. So much noise. Feel ill. Saw them rutting in shower yesterday; no shame, either of them. Try infirmary. Maybe sleep there. Still feel ill. Wish they _(ink trails off)_


End file.
